June 1st, 2012 is the day I achieved what few people thought would be possible.
I successfully traveled through time.
Actually, maybe August 5th, 2015 is a more accurate date for my accomplishment. I'm still getting use to the fickleness of what we call time. Or, rather what you call time. Maybe, I am uncertain and this is still new to me. If you have been a long time reader of this blog you know that it was originally called, WEEKLY RANT. (Weakly Rant may have been more accurate) This blog was just that, weekly. As I am sure you are fully aware the last update came April 5th, 2012. Four weeks before my unprecedented jump in time. To those who have waiting these agonizing 173 weeks, I apologize. I did not know how far my jump would take me. I did not know it would increase the size of my penis to pornstarical proportions. I did not know that I could only go forwards and not backwards, but here we are. You, the reader of a poorly written blog on a mostly defunct Google platform and me. Me, a man lost in time. I mean what the fuck happened in three years?!
1. Apparently, racism is back? I mean didn't Obama end that? How the fuck did he get elected again and still not end racism?
2. I don't work at the Alley anymore?! How they hell did I pull that off?
3. Hannah Montana did what?! No, really what did she do?
4. Was Drake a thing in 2012? Meek Mill really needs to come back swinging.
5. I'm ready to write again. It's only been a month for me, but its been three long years for you. Just know I am back, for better or worst. I have three years of pop culture and politics to catch up so each week I will tackle something I missed in better hopes I can make you understand it better. (I understand everything already) So lets see how long this lasts.
Picture of the Week
Next Week: Why I plan to vote for Donald Trump...
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